ioana
in quest for genuine
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About Me
- Name: ioana
- Location: Bucharest, Romania
I experiment with myself and the world around me. I always seek for that small sparkle of what's real and authentic in things, people, nature...
Archive
Friday, November 30, 2007
Our physical limitations
Sometimes I just forget! It just goes out of my mind for ages, until it hits me straight in the head: I am made of flesh! Flesh, blood, bones, whatever, the idea is that this…”system”, this whole that makes up for the physical me, decided to take a break last week. A serious break!
One day I’m up and cruising, and the other I crash in bed, rocket high fever, unable to move, to think, to act! I stayed in bed for more than a week, with fever as high as 40degrees. Antibiotics only seemed to be good to kill my stomach, but did nothing with the sickness itself. Figures… After 3 medical check-ups, 2 intravenous antibiotic doses (yes, pumped straight down my veins) and a couple of days, there was still no change. It felt strange, like my mind was detached of my body, and was able of doing everything it’s used to, but my body was useless, unable to do anything except lie down.
It seems that after a few long hours with such a high fever, hallucinations can occur: dizzying images, fast-forward moving pictures, tunnels of water or fire, strange people, mostly of which I didn’t understand. But I was lying in bed with my eyes wide open, and still seeing all these things. My mind knew they weren’t real, but that didn’t stop my eyes from seeing them. At one point the dim light coming from the street through the window changed its shape, and I saw the shadow on the ceiling coming down gently like a feather towards me. I knew that if I would stretch my arm to touch it nothing was really there, but I did see it…light and gentle, floating down! Who needs crack when you have 41degrees fever, huh? :)
Bottom line is, I’m starting to worry! I mean, the only thing that can really be called “unhealthy” in my life is my lack of physical exercise. Apart from this, I quit smoking months ago, I eat pretty balanced (healthy wouldn’t be quite an appropriate word), I don’t work long hours at the office, and I have a happy and fulfilling life. So don’t mind me asking, but what the fuck? I had 2 colds this year, one sinusitis and then this fever thing. I’m starting to feel like an old hag whose body is beginning to disintegrate. Yuck!
I can’t even bare to look at myself in the mirror now, I feel like slapping the girl I see there! Oh, and to add on top on this, the massage therapist that came to our office today (did I tell you I work in a FABULOUS place, did I??) told me I really should start exercising, otherwise I’ll end up with back problems. Wonderful, all I needed was a reminder!!! At this point I see a grim future for myself, where I will be forced to leave the unhealthy city life, move up to the mountains and start on yoga. And shave my head and become a monk (well, nun actually, since I don’t include transgendering in this plan!).
One day I’m up and cruising, and the other I crash in bed, rocket high fever, unable to move, to think, to act! I stayed in bed for more than a week, with fever as high as 40degrees. Antibiotics only seemed to be good to kill my stomach, but did nothing with the sickness itself. Figures… After 3 medical check-ups, 2 intravenous antibiotic doses (yes, pumped straight down my veins) and a couple of days, there was still no change. It felt strange, like my mind was detached of my body, and was able of doing everything it’s used to, but my body was useless, unable to do anything except lie down.
It seems that after a few long hours with such a high fever, hallucinations can occur: dizzying images, fast-forward moving pictures, tunnels of water or fire, strange people, mostly of which I didn’t understand. But I was lying in bed with my eyes wide open, and still seeing all these things. My mind knew they weren’t real, but that didn’t stop my eyes from seeing them. At one point the dim light coming from the street through the window changed its shape, and I saw the shadow on the ceiling coming down gently like a feather towards me. I knew that if I would stretch my arm to touch it nothing was really there, but I did see it…light and gentle, floating down! Who needs crack when you have 41degrees fever, huh? :)
Bottom line is, I’m starting to worry! I mean, the only thing that can really be called “unhealthy” in my life is my lack of physical exercise. Apart from this, I quit smoking months ago, I eat pretty balanced (healthy wouldn’t be quite an appropriate word), I don’t work long hours at the office, and I have a happy and fulfilling life. So don’t mind me asking, but what the fuck? I had 2 colds this year, one sinusitis and then this fever thing. I’m starting to feel like an old hag whose body is beginning to disintegrate. Yuck!
I can’t even bare to look at myself in the mirror now, I feel like slapping the girl I see there! Oh, and to add on top on this, the massage therapist that came to our office today (did I tell you I work in a FABULOUS place, did I??) told me I really should start exercising, otherwise I’ll end up with back problems. Wonderful, all I needed was a reminder!!! At this point I see a grim future for myself, where I will be forced to leave the unhealthy city life, move up to the mountains and start on yoga. And shave my head and become a monk (well, nun actually, since I don’t include transgendering in this plan!).
Friday, November 16, 2007
My cool friends
I've just updated my Cool Friends column, and I intent to keep it like that (updated :). I realized it's quite a shame not to tell you about these wonderful people that make my life a whole lot more interesting and fun! So go on and check their sites out in the left bar.
disclamer: if you are a cool friend of mine and you are not there, it doesn't mean I don't consider you a friend...or cool for that matter! It's just that I most likely don't know your blog :D
disclamer: if you are a cool friend of mine and you are not there, it doesn't mean I don't consider you a friend...or cool for that matter! It's just that I most likely don't know your blog :D
Thursday, November 15, 2007
My beautiful new baby
It’s out on the market now! No, it’s not a “baby” baby, but my last meaningful and beautiful project, that we’ve just launched out in the open at the end of last month! It’s a new Open Management Development Program for HiPos and managers. And it’s FABULOUS! EXCLAMATION POINT!
I’m deeply attached to this work because we started everything from scratch, and I managed the whole brand development, from naming and positioning, to communication and PR events! The whole experience over a few very intense months, many long hours, many sleepless nights, and many challenging conversations! The trick when involving many people in my research is to know exactly what to take from each one to match my ideas and vision of a product/brand. Otherwise I risk making a few fantastic bits and pieces, but end up with a lousy product in the end, because these bits and pieces won’t match together.
And I think this time we’ve done it right – nay, FABULOUSLY! In the words of good old (young in spirit in mind!) Tom Peters, this was truly a WOW Project! With some WOW people, like Lexy, Vio, Oana & Calin, to name just a few! Check out the launch event:
I’m deeply attached to this work because we started everything from scratch, and I managed the whole brand development, from naming and positioning, to communication and PR events! The whole experience over a few very intense months, many long hours, many sleepless nights, and many challenging conversations! The trick when involving many people in my research is to know exactly what to take from each one to match my ideas and vision of a product/brand. Otherwise I risk making a few fantastic bits and pieces, but end up with a lousy product in the end, because these bits and pieces won’t match together.And I think this time we’ve done it right – nay, FABULOUSLY! In the words of good old (young in spirit in mind!) Tom Peters, this was truly a WOW Project! With some WOW people, like Lexy, Vio, Oana & Calin, to name just a few! Check out the launch event:
Friday, November 09, 2007
Pieces of Truth
I renamed my blog into “genuine” because that is my aim with it – have my space of Truth out here! Everything else are just small details that build up my everyday existence. But these details would not be without the Truth, nor would I. I’ve embarked on the journey to reveal the real ME, to dispose of the social/psychological/spiritual/whatever layers I’ve acquired on the road, more than a year ago. And the nice thing is that I realized I actually need this blog, at times to confess something, other times to discover something, to state something, and sometimes even to exorcize something. Depends very much of the feelings involved.
And speaking of feelings, love (in all its forms) is the most troubling of all. I’ve learnt something about myself not long ago: I grew up just a little bit! And I’ve reached a point where I have so much love to give. As to opposed to before, when I mostly needed to receive it, or I was being in love, which is a whole different thing. Now I know WHO I am. I know WHERE I am. And I know WHAT I have to offer. And I knew that I needed a different kind of partner now: one that would be equal, free, and conscious of himself and of what HE has to offer.
Of course most of the times the other person can be very different than I expected. One great thing coming from growing up is realizing that's OK! The easy thing at this point would be to blame him for not being wordy. But what gives me the right to call someone "unwordy" just for not loving me the way I needed/expected to be loved? Feeling like this is very liberating, because these are the exact mistakes I’ve made in the past.
And this time I truly am FREE. I love this word, FREEDOM! It allows ME to be MYSELF, and to be HERE, while HE can be HIMSELF, in a totally DIFFERENT place. Not together anymore. No resentments.
It was the first time this whole way of being came naturally, from my inside. And it simply makes everything OK!
And speaking of feelings, love (in all its forms) is the most troubling of all. I’ve learnt something about myself not long ago: I grew up just a little bit! And I’ve reached a point where I have so much love to give. As to opposed to before, when I mostly needed to receive it, or I was being in love, which is a whole different thing. Now I know WHO I am. I know WHERE I am. And I know WHAT I have to offer. And I knew that I needed a different kind of partner now: one that would be equal, free, and conscious of himself and of what HE has to offer.
Of course most of the times the other person can be very different than I expected. One great thing coming from growing up is realizing that's OK! The easy thing at this point would be to blame him for not being wordy. But what gives me the right to call someone "unwordy" just for not loving me the way I needed/expected to be loved? Feeling like this is very liberating, because these are the exact mistakes I’ve made in the past.
And this time I truly am FREE. I love this word, FREEDOM! It allows ME to be MYSELF, and to be HERE, while HE can be HIMSELF, in a totally DIFFERENT place. Not together anymore. No resentments.
It was the first time this whole way of being came naturally, from my inside. And it simply makes everything OK!
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
Ashes and Snow
Almost every day I feel the need to touch BEAUTY in some form. Sometimes I listen a certain song, look at a certain picture, touch a certain clothing, smell a certain flavour, taste a certain delicacy. But I am a visual person, so I mostly find things to gaze upon, images that completely ensnare me. A face. A look. A color. A feeling. A world.
Now imagine a world of tranquility. A place of inner harmony, of perfect balance with the nature. A world where your cheecks are caressed by the feathers of the falcon, and your sleep is protected by wise elephants.
A story.
How does this story go? How does it look like? What sound does it make?
You can answer all these questions by admiring the work of Gregory Colbert. His poetic and artistic vision have translated this world into marvelous images, of pure enlightment and perfect harmony.
Now imagine a world of tranquility. A place of inner harmony, of perfect balance with the nature. A world where your cheecks are caressed by the feathers of the falcon, and your sleep is protected by wise elephants.
A story.
How does this story go? How does it look like? What sound does it make?
You can answer all these questions by admiring the work of Gregory Colbert. His poetic and artistic vision have translated this world into marvelous images, of pure enlightment and perfect harmony.
Feather to Fire
Fire to Blood
Blood to Bone
Bone to Marrow
Marrow to Ashes
Ashes to Snow
Monday, November 05, 2007
The Reality
It's Monday morning. It's cold. And raining. I sit in the warmth of my office and from the window I look at the rain dropping outside, on the roofs, on the tree leafs, on the sidewalk. People are running back and forth, to escape and to hide from the cold water.
Running...
I sit still with my feelings. Looking deep inside myself I know I will not run. I see my reflection looking back at me, deep in the eyes, and I have reassurance of who I am. I shrug my shoulders. There is no need to run, no need to escape, for I am HERE. And here is the place of truth, the only place that is REAL. And if I search for something, it is not for a feeling, for state of mind, nor for a moment. I search for REALITY, mine or yours....sometimes ours...
Running...
I sit still with my feelings. Looking deep inside myself I know I will not run. I see my reflection looking back at me, deep in the eyes, and I have reassurance of who I am. I shrug my shoulders. There is no need to run, no need to escape, for I am HERE. And here is the place of truth, the only place that is REAL. And if I search for something, it is not for a feeling, for state of mind, nor for a moment. I search for REALITY, mine or yours....sometimes ours...
Te busqué
Debajo de las piedras y no te encontré
En la mañana fria y en la noche
Te busqué
Hasta enloquecer
Pero tú
Llegaste a mi vida como una luz
Sanando las heridas de mi corazón
Y haciéndome sentir
Vivo otra vez
A song for a rainy Monday morning...Te Busqué...Spanish version